Living Awake

Make The Choice To Stay

written by

Anthony V. Lombardo


Learn to Bend Reality!

​

A FREE 7-lesson email course on using dynamic meditation to tap into insights for solving life's challenges and consciously creating your reality.

    Built with ConvertKit

    And Consciously Create Your Reality!

    For a long time, I struggled with anxiety during large group settings.

    One night, I attended a birthday dinner for one of my wife’s co-workers at a restaurant. It was a large table of about 18 people, most of whom I didn’t know. It was a perfect recipe to flare up any old feelings of anxiety.

    At various points throughout the night, some of those old feelings surfaced: feeling antsy, self-conscious, wanting to leave my seat and get away, fear of saying something stupid, etc.

    I started to become highly conscious of myself feeling uncomfortable, getting distracted, dazing off, and reaching for my phone. At one point, when I grabbed my phone to mindlessly scroll, something came over me. I became highly observant. As I began to remove my phone from my pocket, I noticed exactly what I was doing, conscious of every intricate move I was making, as if I was in slow motion.

    I took a breath and shifted my gaze from looking down at my phone to what was directly in front of me. It was like something nudged me to say, “What are you doing?”  For a split second, I wondered, what is the “need” driving this seemingly insignificant action of checking my phone? But, was it insignificant?

    I took another breath.

    Then I looked out into the large dining room and observed my surroundings: the other patrons, the servers, the trays of food being ushered in and out of the kitchen, the sounds of people chatting— and suddenly the urge to distract myself dissipated. I was now no longer immersed in my discomfort but in something far more interesting and delightful: the experience of experience itself and the offer that moment was presenting me.

    I put my phone away and made the choice to stay and accept the gift. While it didn’t completely put an end to the energies of anxiety, like all energies, it bubbled up, passed through, and dissolved. Awareness was the conduit.

    This is the promise of mindfulness.

    In which challenging moments that push you to escape from will you choose to stay?

    ✨ If you enjoyed this, you might be interested in these: